Oct 12, 2011

A step forward

Those eyes always mesmerized her. That smile always exhilarated her senses.

While the rest of the day passed in a fast blur, those few moments in the evenings seemed to last a lifetime. She couldn’t remember when the wide, sparkling hazel eyes first caught her attention. The combination of the mop of curly black hair, the thin eyebrows, the deep set eyes, the round face, and the chubby cheeks along with the dimples that formed had her hooked .She looked forward every single day to be lost in awe. Those moments added meaning to her life.

Her desire was simple. To yield to the fascination, be able to clasp his hands, to feel his fingers around hers. Just once. Simple desires were out of bounds for her. She did not understand why but she knew she had to comply with the rules and be satisfied with just watching him, which itself was a great joy.

Evenings were cold and his smiles rare. Yet, she waited patiently, without missing a single flutter, just for the warmth that she could garner when those pink lips curved slightly upwards and the otherwise flawless surface of his cheeks was adorned with the dimples.

**

As an orange maple leaf dancing along the wind, came spiraling down at her, she held her hand to catch it. At the same moment out the corner of her eyes she saw his stretched out hands across the narrow path. The leaf settled down between them. She could see his longing eyes as she picked it up.

She felt herself giving away to the alluring image of the hand stretched out towards her. Gathering her guts, she took a step forward only to be reminded by the warnings. Torn between the two, she wistfully looked at him; his smile did the trick. Looking around to make sure nobody noticed, she took slow and steady steps forward. As she reached closer, she felt her breathing get heavy. What if he screamed at her ugliness like others! What if he stopped smiling! No, she couldn’t let that happen. She contemplated throwing the leaf at him and running back when he bent precariously, with outstretched hand.

The last few strides she that took were mostly the fastest and the bravest she had ever taken. Her timely intervention prevented him from toppling down to a fatal fall. He smiled encouragingly. She took a step back from him, and offered the leaf to him on her outstretched palm. She waited for him to pick it up. What happened next astonished her; she wanted to scream with joy as his fingers enveloped her index finger. She stared at his sweet smile in awe. She was delighted to know that he wanted to hold her hand, just like she had always wished. Maybe he was the god’s angel that her mum spoke of.

As she stared into his eyes, and he back into hers, she felt her knees buckle and a warm wave wash over her. The moment seemed to last forever, as though each grain of sand trickled by extra slowly, in the sand clock of time just to let her have the beauty of the moment extended.
A tear trickled down on her cheek. She knew the moment had to end. As she stepped back, he clung to her forward leaning over precariously again.

**

“How dare you?!” a voice screamed out and she found herself on the ground. A loud commotion had issued but all she could remember was the feeling of exhilarated elation a few moments ago.

**

She gave a look of longing out of the window every evening. Her outings to the park had stopped.

**

She didn’t know that the change was because of a letter that had arrived at her doorstep days ago which read

Respected Sir,
In eve of the events that occurred last evening, with two year old Kevin almost being pushed by your daughter to a gruesome fall of the bench which luckily was avoided thanks to the timely intervention of Mrs. Smith, we have come to a definite conclusion. We wish to revoke the permissions we had earlier issued. Your mentally challenged fifteen year old daughter, Arianna will not be allowed to enter the children’s park area hereon owing to the danger she poses. Any violation of the same will result in your evacuation from the society. Considering the fact that you are behind your down payment already, we sincerely request you to keep your daughter away from the other children.

Thanking you,
The president,
The society welfare committee


**

Arianna had taken her step forward while the others are yet to step forward from their hapless circles.

As for Arianna, she lives her life contentedly reminiscing her magical moment when she held Kevin’s hand.

****
P.S : While walking back home yesterday evening, heads up, music blasting in my ears I was distracted by a small scream . Turning around I saw a "special child" in crutches; her contorted face broke into a smile so beautiful that my heart melted. For a minute I couldn't gather the guts to look her in the eye. She, a mentally challenged girl , who screamed out of happiness with every step she took, had the heart out to smile at a total stranger. I smiled back at her and resumed sighing sadly at the self centered creatures , the otherwise so called normal people like us have become; worrying incessantly about things that don’t even matter while that girl could smile. Indeed she is a special child.

This post is dedicated to her, whose name I don't know but who taught me something very important yesterday.
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